Shame is the throughline


What 95,000 young people showed us about sex, relationships, and the systems failing them.

The full findings are in our new report.

Asking for a Friend is a free digital sexual and reproductive health platform co-designed with 300 young people, piloted in California. In its first 23 months, the platform reached more than 95,000 users across all 50 states.

This is what they showed us.

Interpersonal violence and coercion shape the relationships young people are navigating.

The key findings in our report:

Only 7% of young people who took our relationship health quiz reported no signs of abuse. A third reported physical violence from a partner. It was the most-used tool on the entire platform, seven times more than the next.

The pathway from needing care to receiving it is blocked by practical information gaps, especially confidentiality fears and unknown rights.

Even within California, where confidential and free reproductive health services are legally protected, most were paying out of pocket or going without because no one had told them otherwise.

From curiosity to crisis, young people want the same thing from sexual health support: room to weigh their options without pressure or bias.

Young people are not waiting to be told what to do. They are doing the work of figuring out their bodies, relationships, and choices long before adults realize they need to, and they are doing it largely alone.

7%


Only 7% of young people who took the 'Is my relationship healthy?' quiz hadn't experienced some form of abuse in their relationship

What's in the report

  • The full dataset behind all three findings, including the design research that shaped the build of the platform
  • Why the relationship quiz exists at all, and what that says about who is in the room when products get built
  • What it actually cost to reach 95,000 young people, channel by channel, including what didn't work
  • Specific guidance for educators, healthcare providers, policymakers, and funders
  • Where we take this next as the platform expands nationally in 2026

Get your copy today!